


Land of the Living

by Ketita



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - Post-Canon, Angst, Canon-Typical Violence, Dark, Death Wish, Eren Yeager/Mikasa Ackerman/Armin Arlert, Eventual Levi/Eren Yeager, Exploration, F/M, M/M, Multi, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Years Later, implied past Levi/Hange Zoe
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-05-18
Updated: 2014-05-18
Packaged: 2018-01-25 13:23:07
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 5,400
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1650137
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ketita/pseuds/Ketita
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Humanity is free, but for Eren and Levi there can be no true victory until they have fulfilled their oaths to exterminate every single titan. Yet the world is a far bigger place than anybody who grew up inside three walls can imagine, and fulfilling that promise may take a lifetime.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. I

**Author's Note:**

> _The world beyond. The final frontier. These are the voyages of Levi and Eren. Their ongoing mission: to explore strange new vistas; to seek out titans and destroy them; to boldly go where nobody has gone in 100 years._
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
> This fic has been a very long time in the writing. I started working on it months and months ago, because despite the revelations currently going on in the manga, I couldn't shake the thought about Eren's stated goal at the beginning: to kill all titans, and how that would work in a _world_ overrun by them.  
>  This story isn't actually 100% canon-compliant in that it's not about the conspiracies, it's not about how they defeat the titans. It's about trying to fulfill the promise of killing them all, and Eren and Levi who both swore that oath.
> 
> I must thank all the people that encouraged me to keep working on this fic: momoicchi27, whose enthusiasm pushed me to actually go ahead and post, mercurial-li, my unparalleled beta, and zee, who keeps me going. 
> 
> **WARNINGS**  
>  This story contains all sorts of unpleasant things that people who spent their lives fighting man-eating monsters would have to deal with.

**I**

They called it the Exodus.  On that day, humanity divided itself into four armies, bristling with weapons, and set out to reconquer the lands beyond the range of the Scouting Legion. The old, the infirm, the afraid, were left behind the walls to live out their lives in peace, but there weren't many of them.  Humanity was winning, at long last, and everybody wanted a part of it.

Eren, Armin and Mikasa join the eastward-bound army without hesitation.  When you don't have a map, all directions are the same; there are enough titans to be killed to go around.  But when Eren found out that Levi and Hanji were headed eastward, he set his heart on continuing to fight by their side.  He is relieved when Mikasa and Armin agree to come along, and excited when the surviving members of the 104th join them. 

That night, the three of them lie together under the stars, talking excitedly of what they might see.   Wall Rose had dwindled in the distance, and Eren hopes fervently never to see it again.  Lookouts are posted around the camp, and so far, not a single titan had been sighted. But Eren knows they're out there, can feel it in his blood.

"I can't wait until we get to the sea," Armin says.  "If we keep going long enough, we're bound to reach it."

"But," Eren says slowly, "once we get to the sea, won't we have to stop?"

"Stop what?" asks Mikasa.

"Stop advancing. Stop killing titans."

There is a brief silence.

"Well," Armin says hesitantly, "if we get that far and don't see any more titans, won't that be enough?  Isn't that what we're fighting for? To be able to live peacefully?"

Eren sits up abruptly. "We're fighting to _kill every single one of those fuckers_ ," he snarls.  "We'll never have peace until they're all _dead_."  Betrayal tugs at him, and he glares at Armin in disbelief.  "I thought you understood that."

Mikasa's hand on his shoulder takes the edge off his anger.  "We know, Eren."  Her eyes are pitch black in the darkness, and he covers her hand with his own.  The red recedes from his vision, and his heartbeat slowly goes back to normal.

"We'll keep fighting together," he insists.  They both nod, and he lies back down to stare at the far-off stars.

Eren dozes off to Armin's voice, and thinks of the days to come, and dreams of tearing titans apart. He falls asleep with a smile on his face.

\---

The city of Hope is young and raw still, barely five years old but already bustling.  From his vantage point on the walls Eren can see all the way to the shipyards, where Armin and whole lot of people are trying to figure out how to make boats again.  Behind them is the sea, a vast glittering expanse stretching to the horizon.  Eren's eyes skitter away from the view.  Instead, he looks back inland, straining to see moving forms heading towards them.

"Still up here?"

Eren's eyes flick towards Jean, then back to the horizon.

"There hasn't been a titan sighting in what, two years?" Jean says.  "Haven't you had enough of them?"

"They're out there," Eren says.  "Just because they're not coming here doesn't mean they're gone. We should be hunting them down –"

"We send out scouting parties," Jean says.  "They haven't found anything for days' ride away."

"Then we should go further!"

Jean is quiet, long enough that Eren tears his eyes away from the scenery to check out his expression.  He has a quiet, contemplative look on his face, and Eren thinks he's seen that look somewhere before.

"There's more to life than killing titans," he finally says, and Eren has to hold himself back from attacking.

"You can stay here and play at policework," he snarls, "with the petty concerns of people fighting over cucumbers or whatever.  When the titans come back, it'll be worth _shit_."

Jean puts on his Sympathetic Face.  Eren wants to tear his skin off."You're not the only one who lost-"

"Apparently I'm the only one who still _cares_!"

Jean slams his fist into the wall, and looks as though he dearly would have liked to smash it into Eren's face.  Eren wishes he would, but he is twenty-seven now, and should be acting his age.

"I'm surprised you're not hanging out with Levi," he spits. "The pair of you can sit and mope on the walls together and share stories of the glory days."

"Levi's back? I haven't seen him."

Jean shakes his head.  "He's at the bar.  Where else would he be?"

Eren leaves his post immediately (what does it matter? There are no titans anyway), turns his back on Jean and heads off.

"You're crazy, Yeager!" Jean shouts. "What's the point in ending up like that paranoid drunk? We've got _lives_ now, why don't you try _living_ a little?!"

That’s exactly what I’m trying to do, Eren thinks.

Eren doesn't bother using the stairs, swinging down on his 3D maneuver gear. Technically they're not supposed to use it in town, but Eren doesn't give a shit. What are they going to do, arrest him?  Jean tried that once, but everybody was so embarrassed at having Eren behind bars that he was released quickly.  Besides, it wasn't like they could contain his titan form if he really wanted to get away. 

Even though at least half the people in the streets know how to use it, nobody else is wearing the telltale straps.  They're uncomfortable, they chafe, and if you don't need to fly away suddenly, why bother?  Most of them have gone to fat, Eren thinks with a sneer.  He's seen them at practice.  They've lost their touch.

He turns off of Main Street, sticking to the side of the road where it hasn't yet been churned to mud by horses' feet.  Another block down, and he can already see the bar.  It has a name, stenciled in faded letters to the wooden sign, but everybody calls it Jack's (it's unclear why; the owner's name is Benjamin). 

The place is cheerful but still empty because of the hour, except for one quiet corner of gloom.  Eren heads towards it, answering a few greetings absentmindedly, with eyes only for the small figure seated in his usual spot.

Eren doesn't ask if he can join him, just slips into the seat across from Levi, and is glad to see that he's caught him early enough that he's still lucid. 

Alcohol pisses Eren off, remembering drunk guards on the walls a lifetime ago, and he tugs the tankard from Levi's fingers.  There is little resistance.  Levi looks up to see who's bothering him, sighs, and lets Eren take the mug away. 

"Fucking brat. I paid for that."

"I'm not a brat anymore, I'm twenty seven."

"Brat is a state of mind, not age."

Levi looks older.  Not just because of the lines on his face or the gray in his hair – he’s circling forty – but because of the dead look in his eyes, the slump of his shoulders.  He only ever looks alive anymore when he's in the air, as if the ground leeches his vitality away, leaving him crippled.  Aside from Eren and a few paltry others, Levi is the only one who still diligently keeps up his skills, and that's probably why he's still trim and fit, despite his drinking habit.

As the night goes on, Eren knows, Levi will get drunker, and he'll start talking to his gone comrades, sharing stories and laughing at jokes nobody else hears.  He hasn't been the same since Erwin died; nowadays, when Levi looks around, he sees more people that _aren't_ there than people who are.  And nobody wants to listen to the sad stories of the days inside the walls, to relive the horror.

Nobody wants to remember that humanity had crouched helplessly, waiting to be eaten.  This humanity is different, everybody thinks. We are strong, we have new weapons, we are free from that death-trap of a city. 

"Find anything?" Eren asks.

"You could come with us instead of sitting on the walls and staring at the sky, you lazy fuck."

"I'm saving my energy for when there are actually titans to kill."

Eren regrets the words as soon as he says them.  Levi's mouth snaps shut and he looks down at hands that don't know what to do now that they're not holding two blades.  He makes a swipe for his drink, which Eren pulls further out of his reach.

"Give it."

Had Levi truly been trying to get it, he could have easily wrestled it away from Eren.  He's still strong, still quick.  But he gives up with a sigh, deflating further, looking even smaller.

"Some days I don't remember their voices anymore," Levi says. 

"Drinking helps?"

"Drinking makes me not care that I don't remember."

Eren looks down at the tankard, the amber liquid glinting in the light, and considers inching it back across the table.  He wants to get out of here, with a suddenness that leaves his throat dry.  The walls are closing in on him, this entire city of houses and people and _walls_ , walls everywhere, and nowhere the clean freedom of a fight, the smell of titan death.

He wants to run away, as far as he can go, to seas of fire and ice, but if he leaves, Levi will be left here alone because nobody else talks to him – he can't go, but he has to – adrenaline is spiking, the muscles in his legs positively _aching_ to be moving –

Before he knows what he's doing, he's leaning forward, grabbing Levi's forearm.

"Come with me," he says, the solution clear and sharp as crystal.  "Let's get out of here.  Let's go find titans to kill."

Levi is staring at him, mouth slightly open, and Eren searches desperately for life behind his eyes. 

The words tumble out of him.  "If I transform, I can carry a lot of weight. Supplies. Ammunition. There are titans out there, just out of range.  Let's go kill them, Levi!"

"Leave?" Levi says.  "Just like that?"  Eren thinks that he was just this side of too late – any longer, and there might not have been anything left to save. 

"Who's going to stop us?"

The lost look bleeds off Levi's face.  He's starting to reconstruct the mask of a soldier, and Eren has never been so happy to see it.  He tugs on Levi's arm again, and this time the other man stands up.  His feet are on the ground, but to Eren, he looks like he's flying. 

\---

Dusk is falling when Eren bursts into the small house he shares with Mikasa and Armin, his mind already buzzing with plans.  They don't need much, Levi says; game is abundant, and they can easily find food in this temperate climate.  They need clothes, ammunition, guns and replacement parts for the 3D maneuver gear.  Eren tries to calculate in his head how much money he has, how much it will buy.

He can't take everything; he has to leave money for Armin and Mikasa –

Eren comes to a full stop. 

Armin. Mikasa.

Armin has his job in the shipyards, and is happier than Eren has ever seen him.  Though Mikasa is not nearly so demonstrative, she seems content with her work in the city council.  Mikasa still trains, but she doesn't keep vigil on the walls.  Armin tries to avoid the topic of Eren's obsession as much as humanly possible.

Can he leave them behind? 

The land beyond the walls, wild, free, full of titans waiting to be slaughtered calls to him like a siren.  He remembers what it was like to fight alongside Levi, as deadly with the new guns as he is with his blades. 

He wants to transform into a titan again for battle, to sink his teeth into titan flesh and rend them limb from limb, instead of using his size to do nothing more interesting than transport logs for building. 

The duffel falls from limp fingers and Eren can't move, frozen.  He hasn't gone anywhere without Mikasa and Armin – not willingly, at least – since Shiganshina.  He can't leave them.

He can't stay.

The thought of freedom burns at his mind, and sets his body on fire.  Unconsciously, his right hand inches towards his mouth, the desire to _escape, escape_ pounding at him.  He grabs his right hand with his left and holds on to it, grits his teeth shut.

Even now, Levi is gathering supplies.

Mikasa and Armin enter the house together, and their conversation trails off when they see Eren, still frozen in the living room, the duffel by his feet, white-knuckled left hand clenched around his right.

"Oh," Mikasa says.  "You're ready to go?"

Eren's head jerks up.  He can't even nod. He doesn't understand what she's saying.

"I'll get my stuff, then."

"Mikasa!" Armin protests.  "Just like that?"

She doesn't answer, heading to her room.  Armin looks around helplessly, then fixes pleading eyes on Eren, who seems to have forgotten how to speak.

Armin sighs, and scratches the back of his head.  "It's just, this is really sudden, Eren.  When do you want to go? Why now?"

Eren swallows. "I was talking to Levi. We want to leave tomorrow. I can't… there are too many walls here, Armin.  I was okay when I wasn't thinking about them, but now. I can't think of anything but the walls. I have to get out."

"For how long?"

Eren stares at him.  He hadn't even thought of coming back.

"I guess I'll go pack, then," Armin says slowly, finding it difficult to force the words out.  He glances at Eren out of the corner of his eye, waiting to see what Eren will say.

Eren knows he should tell him not to come.  Armin has a future here, he's happy here. But… all Eren has to do is stay silent, and they won't have to part. They can continue being the magic trio, they can be together forever. 

"Don't be ridiculous, Armin," Mikasa says.  "You can't leave your ships.  One day we'll need to cross the ocean."

"I won't let you go alone," Armin answers, his voice shaking a bit.

"We won't be alone," Mikasa answers.  "I'll have Eren, and Eren has me."

Armin closes his eyes, and clenches his fists.  "I won't let you leave me alone."

"You won't _be_ alone." Eren finds his voice.  "You have Hope. You're part of this city."

Eren manages to detach his feet from the floor, and steps towards Armin. He wraps his arms around Armin's shoulders, still slighter than his own.  His eyes drink in Armin's features, feeling suddenly the clock ticking away their time together.  Mikasa steps up to them, and they make place for her in their arms.

"Why not think for a little longer?" Armin whispers.  "Does it have to be so soon?"

"If I wait, I might die here," Eren says.  He can't die within walls. And tomorrow Levi will be waiting – Levi, who is like a talisman of freedom.

Mikasa leans over to Armin and whispers in his ear.  If he tried, Eren might be able to hear her words; but they are meant for Armin, so he doesn't listen.  Whatever she says, it makes Armin nod in resignation.

The three of them tumble into bed, and they know that it's their last time together.  The knowledge of dwindling time in back of their minds lends desperation to their movements, which is nonetheless cut by gentleness.  If this is going to be their last memory, it has to be a good one. 

They lie tangled together afterwards, Armin safe between Eren and Mikasa.  Eren can't stop memorizing the feel of him, and knows that Mikasa is doing the same.  Morning is creeping up on them, but Eren doesn't want to sleep away the precious hours.

When he sees the sky outside the window lightening, his heart is gripped by another excitement altogether.  Purpose is calling to him, tearing at him, and he can't wait to be on the road.

\---

To Eren's surprise, it's not just him, Levi and Mikasa.  About fifteen other people have gathered, all of them with slightly shifty looks in their eyes.  All of them are wearing full 3D maneuver gear. 

At a first glance, Eren thinks he doesn't really know any of them, beyond being people he fought beside – some are from Levi's generation, some from other squads – and then he sees Connie.

"You're coming?" he asks, stupefied.  He tries to think back to whether he's seen Connie looking for titans over the walls, and draws a blank.

“Yeah,” Connie says. "I want to kill titans –hey Mikasa, what’s up? –They wiped out my family.  It's the least I can do." The words are short, but the story behind them is neverending.

"Eren!" Levi shouts, arresting his attention.  "What did you bring? How much money do you have? Quit yapping, let's get a move on."

They pool their resources.  Eren's idea of just carrying everything won't work, now that there are so many people; they have to have horses. 

"Will anybody want to sell?" says Avelina, twirling a strand of long red hair around her fingers.  "These horses aren't coming back. And breeding 'em takes time."

"The garrison has horses," Levi says.  "We're entitled to them."

"Yeah, but they won't let us just _leave_ with them," Fabian mutters.

"Are we asking for permission?" Eren wonders. "Let's leave some money and go."

"What if somebody makes trouble?"

"If _they_ make trouble," Eren snarls, " _I_ make trouble." He clenches his right fist.

"That's it, then," Levi says.  "Let's get out of here."

Nobody stops them on the way out.  The few times people try, they take one look and back off.  Maybe it's because they're all striding so purposefully, outfitted for war.  Almost all of them have resurrected their old Survey Corps uniforms, the capes thrown on above their clothes.  Maybe it's because more than one of them has a slightly manic grin on their faces.

Before Eren knows it, they're galloping northwards, the walls fading behind them, freedom lifting them from the ground, turning the wings on their backs real.  He gives a whoop of joy, and is only a little bit surprised when it is answered.

This is his second Exodus.

 


	2. II

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (note that after the break is a flashback sequence. I originally had them in italics, but I know those can be a bit hard on the eyes, so I left them like this. There will be more flashbacks in later chapters, and they'll all have that big line break. Also, flashbacks are in past tense, unlike the rest of the fic, which is present tense.)

Six days out of Hope, and they find three titans shuffling through the forest. They've all been riding in their maneuver gear, despite the discomfort, and the race is on. Eren slings his gun over his shoulders and leaps off his horse straight into the trees. For this, his first kill, he doesn't want to transform. He wants to make this kill as a human. He'll use the blades, but he keeps the gun handy just in case.

At the corners of his eyes he sees the competition. There are three titans, and seventeen people. First come, first served.

Even with his speed and youth, Levi is faster. He skims ahead of them all, and has cut through a titan's neck before the titans even noticed his arrival.

That bastard, he's going to get two-

But Levi meets Eren's eyes across the foliage, and lands safely on a branch, sheathing his swords. He's had his fun, his smirk says. The rest are for them, but only because Levi's letting them.

Eren gets the second, cutting off its arm on the way to its neck just because he can. Like Levi, he lands in a tree and leaves the last for somebody else.

Looking back towards the horses, he sees that Mikasa has taken the reins of his, and is waiting patiently for them to finish.

"Oi, Mikasa!" he shouts. "Didn't you want one?"

"There will be more titans," she calls back. "I'll have my chance." Her smile is indulgent, and Eren finds himself grinning back.

They ride high on adrenaline until nightfall, then camp at the edge of the woods. Dinner tastes better than Eren can remember food tasting in years, and the firelight makes them all beautiful. Even Levi is part of the group, now, though he's sitting quietly off to the side. Late, the moon hanging high above them, they start talking of dead comrades. It's easy and natural, as if those who are gone forever can now sit quietly behind them, safe in the knowledge that they're being avenged. There is no awkward silence, and nobody shies away from the horror, or pretends it didn't happen. Everybody gets a chance to pour out their hearts, without fear of a sudden loud clearing of the throat accompanied by a pointed comment on the weather.

Eren talks about the fall of Shiganshina, and tastes again the harsh joy of Reiner's lifeblood on his tongue, the scream of death in his ears. Some people say revenge leaves you empty. Eren holds his revenge warm in his heart, unpacking those memories of the afterglow on dark days and basking in them.

Mikasa has her own stories, short anecdotes of battles won, of friends snatched from death at the last minute, and those not.

Only Levi doesn't speak, a quiet bubble of silence, occupied with some papers in his lap.

Eren scoots over, curious, and finds him drawing. "What is that?"

"A map. I hadn't realized your imbecility prevented you from recognizing basic cartography."

Now that he knows what it is, Eren can recognize the landmarks of the past six days since they left Hope.

The only reason he can think of to have a map is to find their way back. It hits him like a dash of cold water, because Levi's the last one he would have expected it from.

"What for?" he asks warily.

Levi stares at him, and Eren had forgotten how eloquently his stares could convey his low opinion of others' intellect.

"We don't know anything about this world anymore. How will we keep ourselves from doubling back if we don't mark our way? How will we recognize patterns of titan movement if we don't document them? Bloody hell, Eren, did you leave your brain behind?"

"That's a good idea!" Eren says, the happy high from earlier returning like a flood. "Sorry, I was thinking something stupid."

"I hadn't realized you were capable of thinking anything else," Levi grunts, and turns back to his maps. Eren has to admit, he walked right into that one.

"Eren!" Mikasa calls him away, and he trots over to see what she wants. She's still the same height as he is, and just as beautiful as ever. She looks at him searchingly, investigating every inch of his face, before putting her hand on his cheek. It trails down to his chin, where he can briefly smell the fire on her, before it slides down across his throat to the back of his neck.

"You look good," she says. Heat flares low in his belly, and when he reaches for her, she meets him halfway. They find a quiet spot, out of range of the firelight.

It's the first time they've been together since they left, and it's awkward, touching each other around the empty place where Armin should be. The two of them are unsteady, teetering and unbalanced without their third pillar. Still, it feels good, alive with an edge. Nobody knows what tomorrow will bring, so tonight is real and immediate in a way nothing has been since their forward momentum stopped and Eren found himself caged in a growing city by the sea.

He falls asleep tangled up with her, and for the first time in years, doesn't dream of titans tearing down the walls of Hope.

 

* * *

  

_The battle had been hard, made worse by the fact that they had gotten used to winning. Their new guns, handheld and more powerful than cannons, could wreak devastation on a titan. In the arms of the Survey Corps they were even deadlier._

_It had taken Eren some time to get used to shooting while flying on his maneuver gear. There was recoil to take into account now, the force throwing you out of control in the opposite direction, and constant noise pounding on the eardrums. On the other hand, the guns allowed them to attack from a distance, flying and shooting without having to brave physical contact. When they ran out of the special explosive charges they still fought with their knives, made of a new reinforced alloy that didn't dull nearly so quickly._

_Mikasa had taken to the new weapons like a fish to water, while Eren could only look on in envy. Armin had immediately come up with fifty new strategies for maximizing both defense and offense._

_As usual, Eren was left to throw his heart and soul into training with them, taking down titans with willpower and conviction – and titan strength._

_Needless to say, nobody adapted to them faster than Levi, who within moments it seemed had figured out how to use the recoil as propulsion, and seemed even more like he could fly. During battle it wasn't possible to watch everybody – Eren was too busy with his own targets – but he caught glimpses of his friends from the corners of his eyes from his titan's-eye-view._

_It was more nerve-wracking, being in titan form these days, with the explosives whistling about his head, hoping that everybody knew how to aim, and wouldn’t forget which side he was on._

_The battle was worse than they had seen in years, and now there were no walls or buttresses to hide behind – just trees, the heavy armored caravans, their portable towers, and their weapons. A whole horde of what must have been thirty titans came running out of nowhere, and from that moment onward, they were fighting for their lives._

_Eren couldn't accurately tell how much time had passed until he looked around, exhausted, and couldn't see any more titans. It must have been hours, because the sun was low in the sky, and as the adrenaline faded, exhaustion hit him like a wave. He staggered a few steps, looking for somewhere to collapse where he wouldn't fall on anybody, and people scattered to give him space. He sat gratefully, slumping over, and waited for his transformation to dissipate, or for somebody to cut him out. Right now he didn't have the energy to force himself back to human form._

_From this vantage point, he could see people righting wagons (momentary guilt over not getting up to help, but he had done his part), and taking stock of the wounded and dead._

_There were a lot of dead._

_It wasn't the same, though. There was a fierce undercurrent of pride in these deaths, because humanity had won once again. Tonight they would gather and sing songs praising them, would remember them as heroes, and continue their trek eastward tomorrow. They died free. Eren was no longer afraid of death these days, because he knew he would die unbound and unchained. Better to live a short, free life than a long one in a cage._

_Still, his eyes picked out his friends, inventorying to see that everybody had made it through. There was Jean, no longer as cocky, organizing medical attention for the wounded. Sasha was with a group of people working at one of the wagons. Mikasa was carrying a stretcher. Armin was standing by one of the other commanders – and there was an anomaly; Eren expected to see Erwin there, too._

_He looked around, his eyes lighting on a twisting knot of people off to the right. Despite his excellent eyesight in titan form, his hearing wasn't the best; human voices were just a bit too small to impact easily on his too-large eardrums._

_Now that he was looking he could see Levi standing at the center of the knot, which abruptly scattered around him when he drew his swords. Eren couldn't hear anything, but could see Levi's mouth moving in a shout. Behind him, on the ground, was a slumped form Eren now recognized as Erwin._

_Something was wrong._

_The medics were trying to get closer, get to the fallen commander, but Levi was standing over him, his swords raised aggressively. Every time somebody stepped closer, Levi lashed out, the lack of control in his movements obvious in the contrast with his usual smoothness._

_Erwin was down. The knowledge galvanized Eren, drew energy up from somewhere deep inside him. He got his feet under him and started moving, one earth-shaking footstep after another. Levi heard him coming, of course; Levi knew the feel of advancing titans down to his bones._

_He looked up and up at Eren and braced himself, obviously torn between the huge threat from above, and the ones on the ground. If he jumped to attack, he would leave Erwin open to the people surrounding him._

_"Fuck off, Yeager!" he screamed. "I'll fucking tear out your arms! You come one step closer and-"_

_Levi, who never lost his composure, not in the face of defeat, not in the face of death, had tears on his cheeks._

_Eren knelt and reached for him, then snatched his fingers away before Levi could nick them. In the air, Levi was definitely faster than he was, but on the ground was a different story. Without leaving Erwin's side there was only so much he could do. Eren managed to grab one of the swords flat between his fingertips, and gently shook it to dislodge Levi's grip, Levi hanging like a ragdoll and screaming curses. It was either hang on to his swords or allow Eren to pull him off the ground. Levi jettisoned his blades, and Eren immediately snatched at him, grabbing the back of his shirt and hoisting him high in the air._

_"Put me down, I swear I'll kill you bastard, they're going to take him away-"_

_Carefully, Eren dropped Levi into his hands and curled his fingers loosely around him. Levi spent a few futile minutes trying to escape, slithering around in Eren's grasp and clawing his way over his hands until Eren was afraid he'd crush the man in his attempts to keep him from getting away. But ultimately, he had no weapons, and his strength wasn't enough to break a titan's grip. Eren managed to close his fingers in a loose cage around him, and he wrapped his tiny hands around one of Eren's fingers and tugged, tried kicking, but to no avail._

_On the ground, the medics arranged Erwin's body on a stretcher, and covered him with one of the Scouting Legion's cloaks. Like this, with the blood hidden, he looked at peace._

_"I'll kill you, Yeager, I'll kill you, give him back to me!" He worked an arm out between two of Eren's fingers and reached futilely for the far-off ground._

_Only when one of Eren's oversized tears fell inside the cage did Levi turn to him, staring in mute silence. He collapsed to his knees, the small bump feather-light against Eren's palms. The fight drained out of him, and Eren didn't know then that it would never really come back. Levi hooked one arm around Eren's index finger and hid his face._

_He didn't need to. Up here, nobody but Eren could see him fall apart, huge palms shielding him from the people on the ground. Careful not to jolt him, Eren sat down._

_I'm sorry, he wanted to say, but his titan mouth wasn't good at making words. He didn't really know what else to do, so he just sat quietly and held Levi close, until the man picked himself up, scrubbed a sleeve across his eyes, and looked up at Eren with a frozen mask of a face._

_"I apologize for my unseemly behavior," he said stiffly. He was staring straight at Eren, but his eyes were unfocused, and Eren wasn't sure what, if anything, Levi was seeing. Eren nodded, and lowered him to the ground. Levi stumbled for a moment, righted himself, and started walking, aimless. The last of his squad. His wings fluttered weakly from slumped shoulders._

_When it was time for the caravan to move on, he had to be dragged away from the graves._

\---

Years later, Eren remembers that day, and thinks that maybe that was when he stopped feeling free.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments and criticism welcome :)  
> fic tag on tumblr is fic: LotL


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